to sunshine

1:48 AM

heavy heart right now. this is new for me. art has made me such an emotional person.

like I swear. in high school I wasn’t like this. I was totes emotionless. dead inside. seriously.

and then I woke up and started healing. well, actually, i’m not sure i’m healed. but something sparked. and now I like cry and stuff.

I have a test tomorrow. it’s not looking good. but I can’t focus. there are so many other thoughts to be occupied with. and facebook. there’s also facebook.

anyway, having emotions is great. it really is. it makes life so much more colorful, for sure. but it’s also so dang painful.

emotions are such weird things. they make you feel all these weird things that you can’t explain. and then you feel helpless, because you can’t explain it.

it’s like a bittersweetness, and it’s beautiful. but you’re aware that you’re not capable of fully understanding just how beautiful it is. you feel so helpless.

I think most of all, they make you realize that time is going to change everything and that you are a part of something so much bigger than yourself.

painful but colorful. bittersweet. beautiful. I hate that the ones I love have to feel the pain too. that part sucks.

it makes my heart heavy.

but time heals all. hang in there, Sunshine.