currently

As I sit here on my bed at 6am in my pajamas and this giant cozy robe kenzie just gifted me (I feel like i’m wearing a cloud but I can’t say I love the image of me wandering around my house in a giant robe like batman or something), I am having many thoughts.

• this morning i’ve been reading my old journal/prayers from 1-2 years ago, and i’m remembering just how much I was kind of a mess. for some reason this comforts me so much, because yea I was going through many things but I also remember those times as being precious and good, and I was blessed in so many ways at that time too. it’s like even though I had issues God was like, ‘yea I know but i’m still going to take you through your life because i’m not worried about those issues specifically right now and I know where you are headed.’
• i’m also realizing how much better I am doing in some ways right now, even though I am still a work in prog. like, I feel like i’ve been v hard on myself of late and worried for loved ones and whatnot, but in this moment—in recognizing the grand scheme of life and God’s eternal guidance—I feel this sense of joy…and comfort. I guess that’s why this song pairs those two words together. perhaps they r intertwined
• also, I have realized how clearly he answered and responded to some of those prayers, just around the following corner. I was way more lonely than I remembered…
  (h, you were an answer to my prayers. if that’s not a sign that god is using you then idk what is. I am grateful for you)
• it hit me this morning how comforting wisdom can be. it’s so reassuring to have this piece of advice that you can accept and know that you can trust it because it is true. laced throughout my journals are quotes and bible verses. here are the ones I liked rn
  • “This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask him for anything according to his will, he hears us.” – 1 john 5:14
    • I like this because once I cry out to God and ask him something, that means I am supposed to rest assured that he has heard me, and to have confidence that he will handle it. it takes faith but if u have faith that is what u r supposed to do
    • “the Lord will fight for you and you only have to be silent”
    • “God can work through any of us, if we have the courage to trust him and follow his plan for our lives”

that is it for now. i’m so glad fall & winter r coming. I want the theme to be comfort, joy…& maybe robes?

ps; this song is actually amazing